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I’d Never Date a Woman Who’d Have Me As a Boyfriend

I’d never date a woman

Who’d have me as a boyfriend.

No, that’s something that I’d never,

Never, ever comprehend.

That would put in question

Her judgment and good taste.

And just such a woman would end up

Such a sad, terrible disgrace.

No, I’d never date a woman

Who’d have me as a boyfriend.

My review of SIN CITY: A DAME TO KILL FOR

I saw SIN CITY: A DAME TO KILL FOR tonight. It really wasn’t very good. What I liked about the original film, its effects, it being over-the-top, seemed to work against the sequel. Maybe it’s because I’m 9 years older, or maybe it’s because the techniques and style now just seem so stale and cheesy. I’m not sure. The sequel almost seemed like a parody of the original. It was just kind of boring. The one exception being Eva Green, who shows a flair for playing a black widow/femme fatale type, as well as showing off copious amounts of flesh. She shows much more skin than the most chaste stripper ever, Jessica Alba’s Nancy who, after two films portraying the character, never showed herself in less than her underwear or a bikini. Aside from Eva’s assets, SIN CITY: A DAME TO KILL FOR, can be added to the ash heap of middling, disappointing, comic book-based movie sequels to really fun initial entries, along with RED 2 and KICK-ASS 2.

Lady Across the Way

Lady across the way,

Do you see when I see you,

And play as if you don’t,

But really want me to?

 

Do you wonder where I’ve gone,

Those times I’m not in sight?

Do you wonder what I’m doing,

Lying alone there every night?

 

Do you always hope that no one,

Comes knocking on my door;

Reassurance that I’m alone,

For my attention you implore?

 

Do you often think to visit,

But change your mind each time,

For fear I may reject you,

And ruin the sublime?

 

Do you picture us together,

On a beach or in a car?

Do your fantasies beguile you?

Do they take us quite that far?

 

Is our current state quite perfect,

For you the way things are?

Would meeting ruin perfection?

Would that make things too bizarre?

 

It’s best we keep our distance,

So close, yet far away.

I’ll wonder ‘til forever,

Oh, lady across the way.

Watching Westerns

Oh, to ride along the prairie
With Randolph Scott or Don “Red” Barry,
Would not be customary
In real life.

But in the movies we can do it.
Our fantasizing won’t eschew it.
Our western watching we intuit
Eases strife.

We can escape our daily grind.
We can relax and just unwind,
‘Cause in our western films we find
A better life.

Whether it’s pokin’ ‘cross the plain
With Gary Cooper or John Wayne,
Our favorite heroes all remain
In westerns rife.

The Friend Speech

“The Friend Speech” again…
Yes, I’ve heard it before.
You may have heard it too,
But I’ve heard it much more.

Girl after girl,
It’s always the same.
The only things different
Are the girl’s face and name.

“You’re such a good friend.
I’d hate to lose that.”
The common code-words for
“You’re too ugly or fat.”

That may not be true,
But merely sour grapes,
While they date the good-looking,
And the muscle-bound apes.

It’s possible I’m wrong.
It could be something more.
It might also mean,
“You’re just too damn poor.”

We Could Try

You say you’re surprised to hear me say
“You have a sexy voice”,
And that I’d spend more time with you,
If you let me have the choice.

You say you can’t believe that I
Could think you were attractive,
But I thought you were upon first glance.
My thoughts grew hyperactive.

The time we’ve spent together
Isn’t much so, I’d like more.
I think I kind of like you,
But with more time, I’ll be sure.

I know we’re very different.
That could be bad or could be good.
But even if we don’t work out,
We could try. I think we should.

The Single Life

I used to want love.

I used to want marriage.

I used to want to push

My kid’s baby carriage.

 

But all that has changed.

They’re not what I want.

My attitude now

Is quite nonchalant.

 

I do not want kids.

I don’t even want pets.

Both things would add

To my dwindling debts.

 

I like flying solo.

I want to be alone.

I answer to no one.

My time is my own.

 

I’m set in my ways

And old now, to boot.

I’m so old that some

Call me “cranky old coot”.

 

That’s fine, ‘cause I’m happy

Just being with me,

Self-centered, self-absorbed,

Self-obsessed though I be.

 

So have fun with your kids,

With your husband or wife.

I love being single:

My preferred way of life.

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